Dying
by FoxTail17
Summary: Dying is just a figment or illusion of the mind. Killing it would break it. [No longer a onshot.] The girls of Konoha tell about they're feelings of hurt, love, and anger. Chapter 4 up! [Now rated T]
1. I Want to Be Gone Away From this World

A/N: I don't know why I wrote this. I've been listening to this song and it gave me inspiration to write. I don't know why but for some reason, I could tell the story behind it and somehow, this idea came into my mind. Please read!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Naruto. I can get my own ideas. It belongs to Masashi Kishimoto.

I wanted to live, but I couldn't. Seeing my companions ignore me, all except Kiba, who was the only one that acknowledged me. The only one that would hold me; the only one that would care for me; the only one that loved me. Not even Naruto noticed me. I wanted to die so much, but I would lose so much and I've learned that already. Dying is just a figment or illusion of the mind. Killing it would break it.

Tears came streaming down my face. Kiba would always be there to wipe them away, but he was too late for these. I hated myself for being so fragile, so weak, so unnoticed. Hate can hurt, but in return it will hurt even more. The pain of a kunai hitting your body doesn't compare to the pain that I had. I had one life to live and I had to give up my life for freedom; for the independence that I needed. All the laughs and the crushes and the ninja life was just a stage I had to pass, something that could come and go when it wanted to. Needing and wanting are so alike but so different.

I could feel the life coming out of me when I injected the kunai into my heart, the place I had the most hurt. The more I got shunned, the more I was ignored, the more I was unnoticed, the more I wanted to die. I could feel my blood stop flowing and my eyelids wanted to drop and close. My hair flushed into a frail blue, my eyes vanished into a lifeless white, my body turned pale. My life was soon to be gone.

The last I heard was Kiba, obviously wanting to tell me I have to train with Kurenai-sensei. I could tell he was frightened at the sight before him. I could almost feel the life coming out of him when he saw my motionless body laying cold in the forest we were in. My body drowned in my blood as his eyes deepened in shock. I could tell. I could feel his eyes bury into my body as he tried to bring me back. I wondered why I wasn't already dead yet. I then felt the metal weapon emerge from my body. I wasn't dead.

Why? Why didn't I die that day? Doesn't a kunai kill you on the spot? Why? Why did all of this have to happen? Why did Kiba come and save me? Was it by coincidence? I was blinded by questions as I lay in my hospital bed, unconscious and still. I didn't know what was happening to me. I blacked out before anything else happened. I thought I was going to die, but somehow Kiba saved me, but from what? Was it from myself? I wanted to be gone from the world. It didn't want me and I know especially Konoha didn't either. So why am I still here? Don't they know that they don't want me here? Can't they see I'm just a person created for no apparent reason? I'm just a person to be put in the world. I'm just another face; another human; another thing. Something that was brought into the world that could be easily taken out was me. Nothing special happened to me. Not even on Valentine's Day. Kiba was the only one that gave me something. And I don't know why, but I cherish everything from him.

I'm here, looking into the blue painted sky, the sun soon to be setting, and the clouds having fun over me. Kiba is beside me, putting one arm around me, making me feel safe and comfort. I have a chest wound. All of my feelings are coated into it. Everything that happened healed with it, including my feelings. I could feel my life regaining from my suicide scare. The blood is flowing like a non-stop river, my skin coming to their natural color, my hair back to its indigo complexion, and my eyes, not only do they have their color back but they have their happiness back. I could feel it. Kiba did too because when I saw his smirk, that confirmed that he cared for me and if anything happens to me again, I know he'll be there for me. He put me to his chest, indicating it was a hug. A hug, something I didn't have in a long time.

A/N: I know. It was short but it was off the top of my head. I don't know what happened to me when I'm writing. It's like it comes naturally. I've never wrote a story like this but it's always good for a first time. I hope you liked it! Please give me a soft review! Thanks!


	2. When You Went Away

A/N: The first chapter would've been the last, but people liked it so I'm going to make another chapter! This one is going to about Sakura, one of my least favorite characters but I still like her a little. So this is the next chapter so please enjoy!

The feeling of your heart getting ripped out of your own body by the one you love is such a painful thought. I was always ignored by him, Sasuke. I knew he didn't like me, and I knew that Ino would get to him if I didn't, but it hurts so much. Letting him go was so hard. I could feel my heart crumbled into a small sphere that never opened back up. My mind started to ramble into these questions that never had answers. I knew my life would start to tumble down without him.

My heart stopped when I saw him go. Buckets of tears ran freely down my face. My body trembled in anger, love, and hate. No one could stop him from leaving. The voice of him melted my problems away. His spikey navy hair flowing freely in the wind; his perfected moves; his way of life. I began to realize that Sasuke isn't just good looks, he's hurting like me and I knew our problems could never be healed by just a simple sorry.

I hugged Sasuke tightly, not wanting to let go. His heart was pounding against mine, his eyes locked into my deep emerald ones as they mixed into a colorful sensation. His breath was cool and minty, his touch was as soft as his hair. I was hugging so tight that I knew I could tap into his thoughts, which at the time were about me. My soft blossom hair swayed in the air as the wind blew a cool, gentle breeze. His arms around me as I felt his warmth. My eyes soon began to water into a deep green color, almost clogging my vision. The image of Sasuke began to swirl into a funnel as my vision was finally gone. He was gone.

I looked around Konoha. I was walking at the time. My chest still hurts from that night; the night of the death of my heart; the night of Sasuke; the night that was gone. My fingers were shaking as I thought hard about my forever gone love. The image from over two years ago still rummages through my mind every now and then. I could almost hear his voice in the wind when I'm alone practicing or at my house. It was like I could talk to Sasuke in my thoughts. Every now and then a single tear, just one, would flow down my face for him. It was one because he was only one love, one person, one part of me.

I could see the moonlight from my window at home. I lay in my bed, reading a book. I really wasn't reading it. I would always rummage through it. I was thinking about Sasuke. One tear streamed down my face. The moon was so beautiful, so full of life, so much like Sasuke. I could feel the presence of him in my thoughts, wanting to come back to me. I knew it. I didn't want anything more in the world but to have Sasuke want me again. My hair had become short, indicating that my love for him was soon fading away, but I always think about the night he held me. It would always persuade me to grow it long again, but then I thought about his leaving. I would cut it again. I couldn't divide the love and hate to become equal, but love would always overcome hate inch by inch. I had to do it. I had to die to be free of this pain.

My body froze as the katana entered into my abdomen, letting loose my free blood. My body fell to my floor as my skin turned into a pale color. My emerald eyes faded into a fragile green, my eyelids soon began to tumble down to close, and my hair soon began to lose its color. I could feel the hurt slowly leave my body as my blood did also. My floor flooded with my blood. It was over for me, for my love for Sasuke, and it was over for everything.

Naruto knocked on my door, which was the last I could barely hear. He then noticed my door was unlocked. His voice was about to call my name, but he froze. His eyes I could feel shaking in fright, his hair becoming spikier than usual, and his hands wanting to do something, but it was like he was paralyzed. He picked me up, bridal style. He removed the katana out of me. Why wasn't I dead?

Why? Why did everything happen? Why didn't I die? Why did Sasuke leave? Why? Why did Naruto save me? Why? Why?! I was buried in questions my mind couldn't answer. I lay in my hospital bed, being treated from my near death. Naruto saved me, but I didn't want to be. If I didn't have Sasuke to love me, or anyone for that matter, I wasn't needed. I wasn't wanted. I'm just another person in the world made for one thing in a lifetime. I wasn't confused, just mad, angry, and fatally hurt.

I'm looking out of my window again, thinking about the features of the moon and comparing them to Sasuke. No, I didn't shed a tear. No, I didn't want to try to kill myself again. And no, I wasn't hurt anymore. The more my wound healed, the more my feelings did with it. I had a book, and actually reading it. I smiled, wondering how I survived life, and my feelings.

A/N: Yeah, I continued it. I really wanted to because I thought it would be cool to have everyone's point of view from me. Don't you think? It's like this one song inspires me to do this story. People, it's no longer a oneshot. The angst and feelings keep coming on. Sorry if it was short again. I tried to get as much detail in there as I could!


	3. Tears Like A River

A/N: Yo! I'm back and updating! I hope you've liked the story so far. I've never written an angst story so this a first time! Anyways, you are about to enter the world of Ino. Please read!

I hate my life. Nothing ever seems to go the way I planned. My father divorced my mother, I had a little sister but she died when she was born, (Ino never had a sister. I just wanted to make her life even more painful so you could really relate to her.) me and my best friend are rivals, and Shikamaru doesn't seem to care about me. Every night I cry myself to sleep, thinking about how miserable my life is. I want to end it and be free of pain, but the more I think about Shikamaru, the more I think I should stay.

It's not fair. I don't have anyone to really care for me. My own dad doesn't want me. Every time I do something wrong, he starts to curse at me and hits me with all of his brute strength. My tears double as my eyes start to blur. The only thing I could see was this figure, beating me to with an inch of my life. That night, I lay cold in my bed, trying to not to cry so my eye won't sting from my bruise on it.

I screamed out in anger by the rushing river I was standing by. My tears rushed down to the ground as my mind started to crumble. I could see my life flash before me. First, my mom, then my sister, now me. My life was going to end no matter what I do. If I stay with my abusive dad or if I dive into this river. It was like a curse. I was bound to die. I tightened my fists in hatred of my father and myself. Then, I somehow felt cold on the inside and out. The river was just like my tears, never ending.

I was still alive as my body rowed down the river. My life again flashed before me, but it was my life with Shikamaru. I thought about him every day. His spikey black hair, sexy smirk, and nice muscles. But he seemed more interested in that Temari girl than me. My tears started to mix with the water. I was froze to the core. My heart had to have been an iceburg by now, not only from the water but from the icy barrier Shikamaru created between us. He can't get to my heart anymore, but I was always willing to give him another try. Then she would break my chances, Temari.

My head then hit a sharp rock in the river. I immediately blacked out, but my ears could still hear. I heard Shikamaru and Choji coming down to my house, laughing away. I knew Shikamaru froze when he saw a body flowing down the unrighteous river. I the heard silence. Foot steps started to charge near me. All I heard was my name being blasted out of someone's mouth, Shikamaru's.

My head was swirling as I lay in Shikamaru's bed. I had some water beside me, reminding me of how many tears I cried. My wet stained cheeks soon became tainted with love from Shikamaru, who somehow started to melt down that barrier around my heart. My memories of us and my family started to invade my mind, triggering a migraine. But everything seemed to add up to something and influenced my life. It's like I no longer had hurt or hate for me or anyone. It was like I became a stronger person in spirit and now I have motivation for everything. Not even Shikamaru can stop me.

A/N: RIP Ino's mom and sister, though she really doesn't have a sister and no one know's her mother but for now, she's going to be dead with her sister. Anyways, I thought this one wasn't as good as the others, but all that matters is your reviews! Bye!


	4. Teased Love

A/N: I'm so mad! I know I haven't been updating but it's because of my groundation… I was talking in class and my teacher caught me and that's when the groundation started… Then I became grounded all the time and now, I've been good and this is almost like a one in a lifetime chance! So what have you been thinking since I've been 'out to lunch?' Were you all anxious and peeing in your pants just to get to read this? Well, you can go to the bathroom and take a chill pill because herrrrrrrrre we go! Just to say, this is Tenten telling the story if you didn't know…

Why do I cry at night? Why do my thoughts embark on a journey of daydreams about Neji? What makes him attracted to me? But I know he wouldn't go out with someone who is a tomboy and sometimes is mistaken for a boy. All my life I've been mistaken for one. Then when they find out I'm a girl, they always make fun of me. I act tough and scare them away but the inside of me is saying that I should just give into them and cry my heart out. I always have girls come up to me and ask me out and when I tell them I'm a girl, the more I feel different. They walk away and feel embarrassed, but I'm the one that is. Why didn't my parents just kill me?

It's hard to be in love, especially when you're in it. Why does this feeling get in the way of my practicing, plus with the people around me get in the way, also. I wish people could just have one day in my place, seeing how hard it is. The more I think about it, the more I want to scream and kill myself. It makes me want die and go to hell, a better place than this. But love always keeps me wanting him more and living in this hell. Neji, the one I adore and want. But why does he show no emotion? Why does this have to happen to me? Why can't I just be a normal girl and like dresses and skirts and wear nail polish with the glitter? Love hurts so much but it brings so much pleasure.

When our eyes met, I felt like I was in heaven. His perfect structure and moves, his beautiful hair and nice face. We sparred for exactly three hours, the longest we've ever. Every time our weapons met, the more I could feel the tension rising in my body to just wrap my arms around him and kiss. That smirk he gives me makes me body ache for him to freeze and stay like that forever. I swear his breath blew on my lips, making me lose my concentration for a second, letting him bring me to the ground with a kunai waiting to slit my neck. I was defeated with love.

The people around me began to talk more about my gender, if I was a boy, girl, or half and half. I was walking around Konoha and trying to find Neji, trying to get the courage to him my feeling about him and about life, but I had the feeling mine should end soon. So I ran to my house, crying and letting my tears fog my vision. I think I passed Neji along the way because I knew I heard someone call my name, a nice gentlemen's voice with enough bass to get my attention. I knew it was him, but not even Neji could fix my situation. I heard foot steps behind me and catching up quickly. My heart raced between beats, his footsteps matching. But I was too far gone from him. Gone with love, gone without him to love.

I came into my door, more like barging in. My eyes still blocked my vision. I picked up an object that resembled a senbon needle. I wiped the tears from my eyes and I looked at the little needle. I looked at so closely that I could see the life of mine with Neji. The day we met to this day. I smiled at it. My concentration had lost all time. I was swirling with memories of my love. I heard banging on the door and Neji's voice. My fantasy had come to a halt. Why did this all have to happen now and to me? Why couldn't it have happened to Temari or Sakura or maybe even Hinata? Why? Why am I here any longer? Why was I created in this world? Why did I get teased about my gender? Why was I alive? Why was I in love? Why…? The senbon needle had been inserted into my neck, making my body tingle with pain.

My neck began to feel numb, but I surely wasn't dead. So I took out the one in my hair, letting the right bun in my head hang freely to my shoulders. I put it in the other side of my neck, letting the pain indulge my mind into a hurting hell. The banging on the door had ceased. Neji busted the door and demolished the rim of it. I was quick enough to insert the last and final senbon from my hair into my frail neck. My vision had blurred out and my eyes dozed off to close, my body had finally fallen to the ground, making it lay on the cold floor. It was cold as my heart. The barrier had been official and my death certificate was the devil's now. The last I heard was Neji calling my name. How sweet it sounded.

I woke up to the light of sun in my bedroom. Wait? I was alive? How could that be? That night was supposed to be my last. I then felt a hand on mine. It was warm and felt strong. My eyes blinked from the sun and into the eyes of him, Hyuuga Neji. My one love that was real. This was real. My life was real. His touch was real enough to make me believe this was real. I know this wasn't heaven and surely enough it wasn't hell, but the world that stood in the middle, the world that judged to see if you were to enter heaven or hell, the world that made it all happen, the world that was real. My life had become real.

I was held in his arms tightly, like the end of this world would come tomorrow. His head lie on my left shoulder and mine on his right. My hair was pinned in my buns, more neatly than ever. My tears had started to fill my eyes. His head came from my shoulder, revealing a look that took concern. But it soon left from his face. Just then, I had been surrounded in black. My lips felt a pressure on them. As that pressure left from my tainted lips, I could see again. Neji's head was on my shoulder again while mine the same. Not only did everyone know I was girl, but never again did they think twice about teasing me. The last guy got jyuukened by Neji the day after I was well again. The thing I learned out of this was love can't be at first sight, but at first experience.

A/N: How'd you like it? I liked the ending saying: "The thing I learned out of this was love can't be at first sight, but at first experience," meaning that you just can't fall in love with someone at first sight but you have to have experience with them like you have to at least know every thing about them before love can really burst. I actually made it up while making this chapter. If you have anymore ideas for any other chracters like Kurenai or Anko or maybe even Tsunade, give them to me and I'll try to make another story with the older people. This was only with the younger girls. Heck, I might even make one for guys… I don't know but what I do know is that you can review! That little purple button at the bottom of the page. It's calling you! Go ahead! Well, thanks for a great story! I hope you all enjoyed the angst, love, and suspense! Tell me what you're favorite was and maybe I'll make a real story like more than one chapter just using that character. Like it's the story going up to the point of the suicide attempt and the after-math and such. Anyways, just review for now! Bye!


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